On Sunday I went along to see David Nicholls and Nick Hornby talk about their work and more specifically their latest novels. It was part of the Durham Book Festival. I can’t off the top of my head remember most of what they said, but I thoroughly enjoyed it, and felt more confident about my own writing endeavors as a result.

Something clicked on Sunday night which made me understand why I’m so adverse to joining a writing group, or share my work with other writers in general. I can’t put it down to anything Nick or David said, but just more my own opinions on their books and where they come from.

One Day I enjoyed immensely. It is the first book to make me cry in a while. I haven’t read anything by David Nicholls before, but following this will be buying and reading Starter for Ten very soon. The book follows two characters Emma and Dexter over twenty years, on one particular day each year. Both characters are flawed, at times frustrating and annoying, but I always wanted things to work out for them. I liked them and I like the story. I was gripped and it was one of those books that when I realised I was coming to the end, wanted to know what happened just as much as I didn’t want it to end.

By contrast Nick Hornby is an author I have read before. High Fidelityis my favourite of his novels. Juliet, Naked had three main characters and again they were flawed, frustrating and annoying. Unfortunately I didn’t care less what happened to them. The story was compelling and I wanted to see what happened in the end, it kept me entertained. But I really didn’t care about the characters. I wanted to, but I found myself apathetic towards their fate. The reason I want to pick up another Hornby book as soon as possible is to reduce the disappointment I felt with this book.

But both books I read, enjoy and critique as a reader. Not as a writer. Writing doesn’t stop my enjoyment of books. Sometimes after reading a particular chapter or finishing a book I really enjoyed it will inspire some ideas of my own. However if I don’t enjoy it I’ve never been tempted to think about how I would have written it. As I read I get lost in the story, and if it’s good I’m too absorbed to critique it at all.

I think this is my problem with writing groups. I don’t care what other writers think about my work. I am writing for myself, and for readers who might enjoy the story. Firstly I am writing for me, because lets face it if I don’t get published I don’t want it to feel like a waste. Secondly for my readers, even if that only ever ends up being friends and family, I don’t want to waste their time. Eventually I hope I’ll be caring about what agents and publishers think. But I don’t care if another writer would have written this in that way. Or another writer thinks that this should or shouldn’t have happened. I write because I love reading and I love writing. Not because I want to impress anyone.

If I get the opinion of a few avid readers that’s far more valuable. People who genuinely love books and love stories. When people are reading as readers they want the story to be understandable and to flow. I want them to be absorbed into the reality I have created and care about the characters and what happens to them.

Wherever criticism comes from I think I have good enough judge of my own work to know when to take it on as it will improve my work as a whole, or when it just comes because someone doesn’t enjoy the genre, or the way I have written. I’m sure there are people out there who will hate One Day and will love Juliet, Naked. Their opinion is no more or less valid that mine. As I hope I develop a knack of writing fiction, I’ll also discover who’s honest opinion I can trust to help me develop my work to be the best it can be. As a writer there will always be people who dislike what I write. I’m hoping there will also be people who love what I write, and someone out there to publish it.

p.s. After Sunday night I’m a little bit in love with David Nicholls… he is gorgeous, geeky, funny and an author! I think he might be my first proper author crush!!!